People Places Pie

Wow, what is it that drives us, that drives me to quickly run as fast as i can pushing customers and objects out of my way in a frantic blacked out rage type of manner to reach my other companions past the mid store, past the back store, past the back dock to reach the tea room, which is just past admin ha. to finally reach them and say with my eyes rolled to the back of my head....

"POLAR BEAR, POLAR BEAR !!!!! QUICKKK".

I turn around with an absurdly struck smile on my face running back past the flappy gateway back towards the area i spotted the polar bear, just to check its still there to cover my back incase ive let the others down. I turn back around and see their faces, all running and smiling just as abstract as myself phsycadelicly, and then they stop. take control of themselves and walk on wards following my tracks.

The Bear System a unique but simple rating system. ranging from polar bears to pooh bears to brown bears , black bears , sun bears etc...
each bear taking its place in the scale of 1 - 10
it was dramatic to make a polar bear call because polar bears of course are a polished 10, im excited spotting a polar bear in rockingham city ??
whats happening, my hands were clammy i looked over at the others.... they were laughing and jumping and high fiving. what have i done ?
....
the polar bear insisted one of them help her with a treadmill.
i watched
and
waited......

was it a trick ? i peared over the footwear shoeboxes....just another ploy to kill another team member, its happened before it happens every where, they took the bait and now just like every other polar bear they were riding the wave of a high and mighty crest. and there was nothing i could do. i retreated to the tea room to consume a chip sandwich.

Clock Shitter

"oh christ almighty" the words of a terrified english woman, she needs to excrete, her stomach it churns and turns like a monkey on crack trying to break free out of a cage forged by his inner lack of mindfulness. Where does she turn ? every way she looks left, right, up, down walls of white solid, block her view. Its horrible the pain is excruciating shes suffering.
"burrp, sorry" ...
i leaned back in my chair and looked back at herwith disgust but for some unknown reason i felt provoked to feel sorry for her, even though i knew shes a bitch and has small voodoo dolls of me that she constantly tortures the crotch region of , its the only explanation for my rescent posture deformation in my junk. she burps again...whats wrong with this woman this...viking. she is convinced that she's sick maybe its something else, maybe its all those days she spent with the butt pirate in this small window deprived room...imagine if we were locked in here forever ? i dont think i could do it , after the first few hours i know for sure she would start having minor mind flashes of her eating me, shes that type of lady...beast....viking.

Again she burps, ive tried to coucil her in going to the toilet to take a shit, but shes compelled to stay ....its strange...sacrifice your comfort in the work place because getting one of the others employees pubes on your bum cheek is sooooo much worse, especially if its a eewok. and then thats where this horrible idea was given birth, The Viking and I
speaking about how much time we love spending on the toilet even if we already have done a Huge shit and theres nothing left in the tank.
Its just another one of those things Bruce.

Double Team Admin

THERES NOT MUCH TO SAY ABOUT THE ADMIN TEAM IT OCNSISTS OF 2 LADIES WOMEN ..PEOPLE. VICKY AND SHEENA, YESS VICKY THE COLD HEARTED TURKEY EATING VIKING AND SHEENA THE CRUDE SOMOAN, WELL SHES ONLY CRUDE EARLY EARLY IN THE MORNING. SHE DOES ENJOY THE JAM ON TOAST WHERE AS VICKY GETS OFF ON HAM ON TOAST. THE TWO MET ON A DARK WINTERS DAY WHEN VICKY WAS SAILING AROUND ON HER MOTHER SHIP WHEN SHEENA AKA BOPPER WAS PASSING BY ON HER RAFT OUT IN THE REDISH MORONE SEA KINDA PURPLE ACTUALLY. THEY MET EYES...THEY MET LIPS. THEY MET HEARTS. IT WAS INEVITIBLE THE PASSION WAS EXPLODING. THEN THE ONLY RIGHT THING TO DO WAS FIGHT EACHOTHER TO THE DEATH. A SACRIFICIAL CEREMONY OF LOVE, ROMANCE, PRIDE AND FREEDOM. THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THE WHOLE WORLD TURNED UPSIDE DOWN THE CURTINS RIPPED WIDE OPEN THE SUN BLAZED THROUGH THE HOLES LIKE A POO GAZING INTO THE DAYLIGHT OF THE GLISTENING WATER BELOW OUT THE EYE OF THE SPHINCTA WATER AND RAINBOWS AND BUTT PIRATES CAME ROARING THROUGH IT WAS SPECTACULAR THE VISION THE SITE THE MEMORIES ALL CLUSTERED TOGETHER LIKE A GAY RIGHTS PARADE, AND THEN IT BEGAN....LIFE.

spinning on the spinny chair

We love spinny chairs... spinny chairs are great. whats greater still is writting about the spinny chairs in work whilst not doin any work. awesome. SPINNEYYYY!!
question... if you spin on the spinny chair and get dizzy, can you counter act the dizziness by spinnin the other way? i think you can although only tested it whilst bein very drunk... probably makes my research null and void. it upsets me that they're qiute pricey though. i cant afford to have one at home...
sheena has one at home... feelin a lil jealous.
my spinney chair was fabulous when i first got it...i took it home with anticipation building and dreaming of the whirly feeling id get from spinning in my very own spinney chair...yet it turned out to be much much more than i expected.....